Logo

Logo

‘There is no room for ego in a marriage’

According to Dr Saktirupa Chakraborty and Dr Suranjan Chakrabarti, both consultant obstetricians and gynecologists, a marriage is always about mutual respect, trust and shared values.

‘There is no room for ego in a marriage’

According to Dr Saktirupa Chakraborty and Dr Suranjan Chakrabarti, both consultant obstetricians and gynecologists, a marriage is always about mutual respect, trust and shared values. United by their profession and strengthened by life’s challenges, the couple has spent over 45 years supporting each other through thick and thin.

Introduced during their house staff days, the couple’s marriage was a blend of love and arrangement. “My wife joined as house staff at the Medical College while I was a senior house staff. We were both drawn to each other but never expressed. Once my mother-in-law got sick and was admitted to the hospital. She saw me there and eventually contacted my family, leading to our arranged marriage,” shared Dr Suranjan. The couple tied the knot on 5 February 1979.

Advertisement

However, within a year, the couple had to go through a challenging situation. Dr Chakrabarti suffered a compression fracture in his vertebral column due to irregularities in eating habits as he was a doctor. During this period, Dr Saktirupa had to solely handle the responsibilities of managing their home and starting her own career. “It was a tough situation,” she shared. “I wanted to complete my post-graduation and then start my career. However, because of his accident, I had to step up.”

Advertisement

Dr Suranjan praised his wife’s resilience and capability to adapt. “She managed everything—her new job, the household, and my care—with incredible dedication. She handled everything on her own for up to six months as I was bedridden. Her resilience during that time was something commendable.” Dr Saktirupa further added, “It was tough, but my husband’s constant support kept me going. Even in his illness, he made me feel that I wasn’t alone in this fight.”

According to the couple, the reason for their lasting relationship lies in mutual understanding and shared priorities. As doctors, they understood and accepted the importance of their profession and the limited time they could spend with each other. However, this in turn strengthened their bond. “As we were both doctors, we knew that our first priority was serving patients, and as we were from the same background, we understood the significance of our profession and never complained,” said Dr Saktirupa. “Some difficulties arose when our child was young, but we had very supportive neighbours and relatives who took care of our child when we both had to go out for work,” she added.

“Trust and adjustment are the foundation of our marriage,” says Dr Saktirupa. “We are like each other’s walking stick. We depend on and support each other through every challenge.” Dr Saktirupa also emphasised on the values learnt from her parents: “I’ve seen my parents’ commitment to each other. They went through a lot. Like nowadays, back then, there were no phones to contact someone whenever they wanted, yet their love and trust set an example in front of me. Everything I have learned—whether it’s my dedication towards work or my sense of responsibility towards marriage—I have learnt from my parents.”

Dr Suranjan concluded, focusing on equality and respect. “Marriage is about compromise and trust. There is no room for ego in a marriage. Adjustment is not just one-sided. Both parties must adjust and respect each other. Marriage is a responsibility of both partners and they should contribute to it equally to sustain it.”

Advertisement