If you’re dating a man like this and are thinking about getting married, think again. Marriage does not make a man child grow up. On the contrary, they tend to feel more entitled to do what they want and not develop themselves any further. If you like providing maid service and childcare to adults, this is a great option. If not, run for the hills!
(Representational Image: iStock)
In the current world, when definitions of masculinity are constantly changing, there is an interesting phenomenon that has been noticed by several single women who are looking for a partner – finding themselves a man child. The man child is a recent addition to the dictionary to describe a person with qualities that would otherwise be considered toxic, are given a huge pass under the guise of being sweet and cute.
No, here we don’t just mean a guy who lives at home with his parents. A lot of us are stuck in that millennial-shaped boat and are still doing pretty well with life. A man-child is a guy who just hasn’t grown up yet. SURE that sounds fun, to begin with, but when it comes to relationships, they don’t exactly excel, they need just babysitting.
It’s not just about babysitting. The man-child psychology is rather interesting and much deeper than merely a man acting like a child. The phrase is essentially used for a fully grown adult male who behaves immaturely even in important situations. His mental faculties certainly do not match his chronological age and his words and actions may cause tremendous problems for his partner who expects better.
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The interesting part of the man-child syndrome is that these individuals seem like a lot of fun in the initial stages of a relationship. They tend to take things lightly, they appear to be chilled out and make it seem that they live life to the fullest.
However, the biggest problem of dating a man child is that initially you just don’t realize that there is a problem. And by the time you figure out what the actual issue is, it may be too late. As I mentioned above, there is a high chance that his antics may be considered cute and hence go unnoticed. Your friends and family might even blame you for complaining needlessly about who doesn’t like a man with child-like ‘innocence’?
Does this all sound familiar? If you’re stuck with a boyfriend who enjoys nights out, shrugging at life, and never facing up to responsibility, check out these 10 tell-tale signs that you’re dating a man-child.
1. He refuses to take responsibility
Have you seen a stubborn child who gets caught doing wrong things? S/he either throws a tantrum or comes up with an excuse or shifts the blame onto someone else. A man child in a relationship behaves the same way, especially when things go wrong. It never is his fault.
A responsible man never hesitates to take charge. If a plan does not work out or he faces failure, he will try to analyze what went wrong and then fix it. But a man-child rarely takes accountability for his actions. Whenever a crisis strikes, his first reaction would be to run away from it.
2. He cares a lot about his friends’ opinions
It’s a relationship golden rule that alarm bells should be ringing if he refuses to let and his friends are in the same room together,
But equally, if you have been introduced to the ‘lads’ *eye roll* and promptly ignored for the rest of the night, or completely dismissed by his equally immature mates, that’s not okay either.
A grown-up, adult human being who’s truly into you will always be proud of you and want to introduce you to the other important people in his life. If he’s putting his friends and their opinions before you, then there’s probably a giant ‘MANCHILD’ arrow pointing in his direction.
3. He lacks discipline
How often do you clean his room, sort out his papers, clear the mess in his closet and arrange his stuff for him? If you find yourself doing it over and over again with no improvement from his side, then it’s a clear indication of a man child syndrome. Discipline does not just mean leading a regimented lifestyle.
Being disciplined means having a certain routine and respecting that of others. A lot of women take pride in managing their boyfriends’ or husbands’ personal and professional affairs, right from the food they eat to the bills they pay. “My boyfriend is a man child, he gets lost without my help” – they claim coyly as they run around, being overprotective and doing all the work.
4. He is most often a mama’s child
Perhaps this is where it begins. More often than not, a man child is a person who has been spoiled rotten by his overprotective mother. As a kid, he would have been pampered to the extreme with everything laid out of him. The result: he lacks the skills to deal with the challenges of the real world.
Do not be surprised if your man child boyfriend turns out to be a typical mama’s boy after marriage – someone who dares not go against what his mum wants. Of course, he may be doing it in good faith because ‘mama knows best’. But it shows a deep lack of confidence if he can’t stand up for himself.
5. You find yourself nagging.
You constantly have to prep him on appropriate behavior when you go out. You are frequently disappointed because you can’t count on him. You see him making bad choices in his career or finances and can’t stop yourself from advising him on what to do. You’re tired of picking up his underwear off the floor and cleaning his dirty dishes. You hear the words coming out of your mouth and you’re annoyed at yourself. Nobody likes nagging but it becomes a way of life when no matter how many times you ask someone to do something they do not follow through.
If you’re dating a man like this and are thinking about getting married, think again. Marriage does not make a man child grow up. On the contrary, they tend to feel more entitled to do what they want and not develop themselves any further. If you like providing maid service and childcare to adults, this is a great option. If not, run for the hills!
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