Lost art of waiting

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In our hyper-connected world, waiting is increasingly seen as a flaw in the system rather than an inevitable part of life. Instant messaging, on-demand entertainment, rapid deliveries, and fast food have become so ingrained in our daily routines that we scarcely notice how our patience has eroded. Yet, the art of waiting once a cornerstone of personal growth, relationship building, and societal advancement holds the key to many aspects of human fulfilment. As instant gratification reshapes our expectations and behaviours, it is worth exploring what we have lost and why rediscovering the virtue of patience is more important than ever. The modern era is defined by speed.

With just a few taps on a smartphone, we can summon a taxi, order groceries, or stream the latest movie. This unprecedented convenience is the result of technological advancements aimed at eliminating inefficiencies. While these innovations have undeniably made life easier, they have also conditioned us to expect instant solutions to almost every problem. Social media platforms, for instance, are designed to provide immediate feedback in the form of likes, shares, and comments. Online shopping platforms offer same-day delivery, erasing the anticipation that once accompanied waiting for a parcel. Even in our personal lives, dating apps allow us to browse potential partners like items in a catalogue, fostering a culture where choices are plentiful but commitment is fleeting.

While these changes have improved productivity and convenience, they have also nurtured a sense of impatience. We’ve come to see waiting as an obstacle rather than an opportunity, a mind-set that has farreaching consequences for our relationships, creativity, and mental wellbeing. Historically, waiting was not only unavoidable but often celebrated as a virtue. Agrarian societies, for example, were intimately familiar with the rhythms of nature. Farmers waited for the rains, the harvest, and the changing seasons. This waiting was active, filled with preparation, observation, and hope. Philosophers and spiritual leaders across cultures revered patience.

The Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu viewed it as a pathway to wisdom and power, while the Greek Stoics believed enduring challenges with grace was the key to living a virtuous life. In Christianity, patience is one of the seven heavenly virtues, symbolizing the strength to endure hardship while remaining faithful to a higher purpose. These teachings and traditions underscore the value of waiting as a transformative process. It was through waiting that people developed resilience, learned to navigate uncertainty, and cultivated deeper connections with the world around them. The erosion of patience in modern society has profound implications. Strong relationships are built over time, requiring effort, understanding, and the willingness to endure challenges.

However, the culture of instant gratification fosters a mindset where people expect quick fixes even in their personal lives. The decline in face-to-face communication, the rise of superficial interactions on social media, and the impatience to resolve conflicts are all symptoms of this shift. The result? Relationships that are more fragile and less fulfilling. When we lose patience with others, we miss the opportunity to truly understand them, to grow together, and to build bonds that withstand the test of time. The creative process is inherently slow. Great works of art, literature, and innovation often require years of trial, error, and refinement.

The pressure for quick results can stifle this process, leading to rushed outputs that lack depth and originality. For instance, writers who once spent years crafting their novels now face the pressure to churn out sequels in months. Similarly, start-ups often prioritize rapid growth over sustainable innovation, leading to short-lived successes. The inability to wait has also taken a toll on mental health. Constantly seeking instant results creates a cycle of anxiety and dissatisfaction. When our expectations are not met immediately, we feel frustrated, often blaming ourselves or others. This constant sense of urgency can lead to burnout, making it difficult to find joy in the present moment. Reclaiming patience as a virtue begins with a conscious effort to reframe our relationship with time. Waiting need not be a passive or frustrating experience. Instead, it can be an opportunity for reflection, growth, and connection. Mindfulness encourages us to live in the present moment, appreciating the journey rather than fixating on the destination. For example, instead of dreading a long queue, we can use the time to observe our surroundings, reflect on our day, or engage in light conversation.

Studies have shown that people who can delay gratification often achieve greater success and happiness in the long run. Simple practices, such as saving up for a desired item rather than purchasing it on credit, can help us rediscover the joy of anticipation. Activities like gardening, cooking from scratch, or crafting inherently require patience. These hobbies not only produce tangible results but also foster a sense of accomplishment and fulfilment that instant solutions cannot replicate. Taking breaks from technology can help reduce the constant bombardment of instant feedback and allow us to engage more deeply with activities that require time and effort. To rebuild a culture that values patience, we need to start early. Schools can play a crucial role by teaching children the importance of perseverance and the rewards of longterm effort.

Stories, both traditional and modern, should celebrate the triumphs of individuals who endured challenges to achieve greatness. Workplaces, too, can shift their focus from immediate results to sustainable growth. Encouraging employees to take the time to develop skills, refine ideas, and build meaningful collaborations can lead to more innovative and enduring outcomes. Patience is not just a virtue of the past it is a necessity for the future. As we navigate a world increasingly defined by speed and convenience, we must remember that some of life’s most meaningful experiences cannot be rushed. Whether it’s nurturing a relationship, mastering a skill, or simply enjoying a quiet moment, waiting has its own rewards. By rediscovering the art of waiting, we can reclaim a sense of balance in our lives, reconnect with the people around us, and find joy in the slow, steady unfolding of time. After all, it is often in the waiting that we truly live.

(The writer, a Thrissur-based accountant, authors contributions in English and Malayalam.)